Feb 16th 4:49am

Here again.  I have been here before. 
1 year ago, in fact. 
I've never really broken up and gotten back together. 
That just wasn't my style. 
It happened with us last year.  I wanted you back.
 Last year i was afraid. 
It's different now. 
You've betrayed me. 
You desecrated what was, to me, sacred.
Sacred. 
You have left me alone, like i was never really there.
The pain must surely subside one day,
or my contempt will burn into greater hatred for you. 
Let us not forget where it is coming from
the here and now. 
My wounded heart. 

You were my closest friend
and i thought you were the best
but best friends don't do that. 
Best friends don't just leave...not the way you did.
I cry even now for the pain in my chest.
I take a deep breath and say goodbye.
It's all i can do.
When i do not, it festers.
I become bitter and you are the core.
I have to stop it there or i will forget.
I will fall into the anger and i do not want that for me, for you.
Instead i will remember you as my friend
my lover
and i will work to accept the fact that you are gone
even though i find no reason.

I take a deep breath
and i let you go
let the pain blow out
with the wind.
By thomasina kundalini